Purge for Presence

In 2017, our family took a leap of faith and moved part-time to Nosara, Costa Rica. The lifestyle, natural beauty, and this sleepy little surf and yoga town served to soothe our souls.

Raising our children barefoot and close to nature was a full-body YES.

While living abroad, parts of our hearts and minds were still firmly tethered to Colorado—until they were not.

Like many others in 2020, our world turned upside down. We closed our yoga studios and sold our home, deciding to take a break to live with family in my childhood state of Virginia.

Not knowing when or where we would eventually settle down again, we packed up our belongings that would fit into Grandpa’s 2004 Chevy Tahoe. We tearfully said goodbyes to family and friends, pulled away and left our former life in the Mile High.

Patrick and I navigated our uncertainty and deep sorrow while trying to remain positive for our girls, who sat confused in their booster seats, cradling their guinea pig.

Everything else from our first family home—the furniture, the dishes, the kids' first artwork, everything that makes a beloved home—ended up Tetris-ed from floor to ceiling in a 16’x24’ storage unit, awaiting our attention.

Similar to when a real person dies, often their stuff is the last thing you want to deal with amidst all the emotion and loss.

So, what do you do?

You throw it all into storage and start the painful experience of paying to have your stuff stored!

You see, part of me dreamed of having all our things to one day bring comfort and beauty to our simple three-room Costa Rican house. And because who wants to deal with a 16’x24’ storage container, we just kept not dealing with it.

Until early this year, Patrick came to me with remorseful awareness of how much we had spent to store our STUFF! It was a wake-up call that neither of us really wanted to face. Turns out that shipping it all to CR would be insanely expensive.

So what to do about all our stored belongings?!?!

We realized that we were in the storage unit TRAP! After months of pondering our next move, we concluded that we had to handle it all at once this Summer

rip

off

the

bandage!

So this summer, we returned to Denver with a plan to repurpose, sell, or discard our stored STUFF! I had looked the other way for three years because it was easier on my heart and memories. But here we were, and it felt like a breakup; Patrick and I were bickering, my nervous system was on high alert, and I could not sleep.

As the unpacking day approached, the whole situation felt more and more intense.

On July 7th, we arrived at 6:00 am with coffee (a stimulant I rarely indulge in).

We started pulling out box after box, setting aside a few select keepsakes.

By 9:00 am, the movers arrived and helped us take 95% of our life to a local charity; whatever they could not use was taken to the dump.

My heart felt heavy as I watched the trucks leave one by one. I remembered the girls playing with the beautiful wooden doll bed and highchair, the meals around our dining table, and our morning ritual sitting with our meditation altar.

Yet something else was happening.

These things were part of a precious time in our past, and the objects reminded us of who we were then. The 200-pound dining table we bought on credit reminded me of who I was during that specific time.

I am not that same woman today.

As the movers drove away, I began to feel lighter. Over the next few days, a new sense of claiming who I am emerged; with the wisdom of the past, all the joy and heartbreak, learning, and failing became integrated into who I am NOW.

This process was a deep purge, a release of things, much of which I had forgotten we even owned or did not resonate with anymore. The energy tied up in holding on costs us not only money but also a ton of mental, physical, and emotional energy that can now be reallocated to the present.

Since the purge, Patrick and I have made leaps and bounds in our marriage, coaching, and, unpredictably, our finances!

Our family is still celebrating this new space in our lives, and we realized more than ever that what is essential is our family, our health, and our bond.

We realize how challenging and costly it is to hold on to stuff that is not truly serving a purpose NOW.

As a family, we have become conscious of what we bring into our lives.

Each item we bring in takes up space, and letting go has helped us to grow.

PS:

For a laugh on the subject, start this at minute 1:10:
This is what Jerry Seinfeld says about Storage Units

Sending love and light,

Cameron